My father’s reaction to reading his State Police files

Looking at the video, I can’t help wonder if I’m being cruel to show the files to him. Although he did want to see them. Hopefully, it will be better next week when we go over his diaries.

My father’s State Police files and diaries written during the war at age 16.

How I wish I could understand Slovenian to read my father’s diaries and police files! I’m learning but it’s going to take some years. In the meantime, I will have to use a translator. It may be quite a job, as my father used a mixture of languages, mostly Slovenian, including very old words not used now, plus Croatian, Italian and even some German words. Probably because of the occupation by the Italians and Germans. The Police files are in Serbo-Croat, the official language of the Yugoslav army.

I’ve just returned from another trip to Ljubljana, researching my Father’s history and looking for inspiration for an art project about how he became a refugee. On this trip, I collected the State Police files about my father and his brother who died. I’m not allowed to publish them until they send me a version that’s acceptable to publish. This is correct as there are other names on my father’s files. These need to be removed, as I only have permission to use the files about my father and his brother. I had to sign an agreement and my father had to sign and have witnessed his permission for me to see the files. There were also files about one sister of his, but apparently, they are very sensitive and her son, who was adopted by his aunt, needs to see them first. It will be up to him if he wants any of the family to see them.

I’ve been told what’s in the State Police files. He was given a death sentence for escaping from prison. My father says that if he had not escaped he would have died anyway with a sentence of up to ten years hard labour. He was in prison for being part of a group of fourteen men in the army who had affected the morale of the battalion by spreading propaganda. I was relieved to see that my father did not kill the guard when he escaped with one friend. He took his gun but let him go. My father will be happy to hear that his friend survived and wasn’t caught. They fled to the woods, and dad waited while his friend went to see his family and say goodbye. He waited two days and nights, then decided he had to go on his own as his friend had probably been caught. I went to the woods he hid in, at twilight, to take photos and imagine. I was really glad to leave before dark. My dad travelled through the woods at night as it was safer to do so. He was then recognised near the farm and shot at, hiding in the cornfield. He eventually made it to the cow shed and got civilian clothes then went over the mountains again into Austria.


Woods my father hid in.



The cow shed my father hid in


I found it surprising and disturbing that the files had our home address in England, where I was born. They accused him of being a terrorist and plotting to overthrow the Yugoslav government from England, where he ended up. This was at a time when the Yugoslav government was known to send execution squads to eliminate enemies abroad. A whole family was killed in one instance. I need to research this further and get actual facts about this, but it means our family could have been killed in our house.

My cousin had my father’s diaries, they had been kept by my Aunt in amongst 1000’s of books. It’s very lucky we found them as the farm had been raided at least three times, looking for documents to destroy. The letter sentencing the whole family to death at the beginning of the war, one volume of his diaries and the diaries his brother wrote while fighting the Communists cannot be found. To have those diaries survive after more than seventy years is a fantastic find, when most documents have perished. I showed them to the professor at the Institute of Contemporary History when he gave me the State Police Files. He was quite excited by the diaries and said there had been great interest in them at the Institute. He said my father had written well and it was interesting that he had written about his feelings. He wants permission to publish them and thinks that a TV producer may be interested in interviewing my Dad. Unfortunately, I don’t think my Dad is up to it, as he is now mixing up languages and finding it hard to talk about what happened. It’s taken me more than a year to get what information I have from him.

I was fascinated how the two sets of documents checked out. The state Police files say the date of his brother’s funeral. His diaries start on the day after the funeral. My father said he started them after his brother’s death, but not that it was the day after the funeral.

I hear quite often that even though Slovenia is now independent, it hasn’t changed and is still run by Communists. But I would never have had access to my father’s Police files, before independence. Nor would there be memorials of those killed after the war, granted they could do better, the Italian occupiers who died have a big area in the main graveyard and are all named with an individual cross, the Home guard have just a tree and no names anywhere.

I will post more about our other exploits on this trip, over the next week or so.

Some images of our walk from Ljubljana to Viktring


The farm where Dad was born


Local farm in a neighbouring village
wild fruit
One of many crucifixes on the road
Typical barn
Local river dad used to swim in


typical hay drying racks


cows resting
selfie of the group


Ferlach, Austria




the dam at Ferlach, Austria


Research into the family history and our land


I went out to Slovenia in July, earlier than the others coming out to join me for our walk over the mountains. The aim was to do more research. I had some lucky breaks, my cousin found Dad’s diaries written when he was 16 and fighting the Communists,  just after he had buried his brother. I’m waiting for them to be translated. It’s very exciting. Then I went into a local photography studio to ask where I might be able to get old photos from that time. The man in the shop was very helpful and pointed me in the direction of the Institute of Contemporary History. It’s there that I met one of the  University professors, Dr. Matevž Košir. He has access to all kinds of documents. He told me there were 30 pages of state police files about my father, including his sentence to death. Also files about his brother and one sister. My Dad was surprised it wasn’t more of the family. I’m going back in the Autumn to look at those. The professor gave me a list of all the 405 young men under 18 who were at the Teharje camp, which I showed my father. My father’s name is on the list. My Dad seemed to think that these were just the lists of those they tried, that in fact there were more like 1,000 boys under 18. This was later confirmed by the professor. The name of one friend he talked with a lot wasn’t on the list. My Dad said many of those not named were killed immediately on arrival.

The professor has also said it may still be possible to make a claim for the farmland that was taken away from my family. He says there will be two obstacles, one is proving they owned it and it was taken away, the other is if they are still compensating people for this. He knows ways of trying to get proof, so you never know. The land is now the site of their World Trade Centre, a bank and several blocks of flats. The photo above is of the land in Ljubljana that we will be trying to claim back.

Protected: Rest dignified on sacred ground my brother and together we will find the path to the blessing of reconciliation

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Commemorative walk over the Karavanke mountains


The route that was taken by the Slovenian Home Guard and civilians in May 1945, to surrender to the British in Austria at the end of the Second World War and civil war in Yugoslavia. They surrendered to the British believing that they would treat them more humanely than the Communists. The British sent them forcibly back to their deaths as part of a land deal.

Our walk over the Karavanke mountains was planned for the end of July 2016. Not an ideal time to be doing long walks, as it is very hot. However, it was important to me to have as many people that wanted to do the walk, together. This meant making it coincide with University and school holidays. At first, I had been very unrealistic about how far we would be able to walk each day. I had planned that we would do the whole 86km over the mountains in three days. This is how many days it took Dad to walk, but he was 17 when he did it and in the army. Luckily, Maria- my sister, told me she wouldn’t be able to do more than about 15 – 20k a day. This meant we now had realistic targets for walking. As it was, I was the least fit and the person who struggled with it most. (Although I like to think it was because I was carrying a heavy camera around my neck, plus tripod etc). I was also attempting the whole walk, which was now a five-day walk. The new plan was that Franzi (a Slovenian cousin) and myself would do all five days, we would be joined at various points by my sisters, brother-in-law, nephews, my husband, another Slovenian cousin Marko, his wife, and Franzi’s wife. Everyone was together for the crossing of the border. However, by the time we got to day five, the only person able to continue was my cousin Franzi. We abandoned the last day and I am hoping to do this with him next year. It would have been better if we could have done it in one go, but in the end on day four, I had to hand my backpack and camera to other people in order to finish that day’s walk.

There were some sad moments along the trip. Just before the border, we arrived at a former German concentration camp, where the prisoners of war were made to build the Ljubel tunnel. Those losing their usefulness died. The most shocking thing was that it was run as a commercial enterprise. Peoples’ lives for profit. Walking through the site was very sad. This must have only just been abandoned when my Dad passed by.


It was also quite moving when we stood at the border at the top of the old Ljubel pass. We had photos of those we were remembering, who had all walked this way to surrender to the British, also those who had chosen to stay behind. The whole family was separated. Most were sent to different parts of the world. Three were in the Home Guard and were sent back by the British, but survived the mass executions of the returned- my father, our cousins’ father ( our Uncle by marriage) and our cousin’s wife’s father. All three were born in the same year, 1927. Two 17, one just 18. These three didn’t know each other till afterwards. They survived because those under 18 were, in general, spared from death. France, who was just 18 lied about his birthdate. The title photo is of us holding their photos.  It commemorates the break-up of the family and the creation of new ones.

Michael Peršin(returned, escaped death then Britain), Ivanka Peršin(Argentina), FrancescaPeršin(stayed behind, prison 6 months), Mara Peršin(stayed behind,prison 8 years) Christina Peršin(returned)
Family group on a visit without our father (he had a new death sentence)
Francesca Peršin (Austria)
Michael Peršin
Franz Peršin (died 1944 fighting Communists)
Mara Vrečar (nee Peršin) and France Vrečar ( returned escaped death)
Christina Peršin and husband. Two photos to be added of Oma and Joze

Even though we didn’t do the last day of walking, we did still manage to visit some of the other places by car. We went to Ferlach in Austria, the site of the last battle against the Communists, who were trying to stop them crossing the bridge to reach the British. The bridge at Ferlach dam was the most inspiring for me, because I learned that this wasn’t the original bridge that they crossed.  The original bridge is under the lake, submerged when they built a new road and dam. Ruminating on this, I thought that I wanted to come back and try to walk the original bridge under the water, which would mean taking up diving again. To me, it seemed poignant that the bridge was submerged. There is so much that has been unsaid, so many people died without telling their story, either frightened or ashamed to, or because it was too painful.  It is a symbol of the deep, the unsaid, the unacknowledged. I was also quite excited by the possible imagery this would produce.  I’m not sure how feasible it will be to scuba dive there, as it’s near a dam and could be dangerous.


It was great to spend time with our families and get to know each other better, particularly bonding over serious issues. It meant just as much to our Slovenian side of the family, to do this walk, as it did to us. It was very thought provoking. It helped me to try to imagine what it could have been like for them. They had to  leave their homes and family, fight to stay alive and then on arriving at a place of safety, were betrayed and sent back, knowing most of them would be killed. All the while they were still  minors or young adults. All tinged with the knowledge that they were on the wrong side and german collaborators, yet felt they were defending their lives from the Communists, who had given their family death sentences, while they were fighting the Germans.

I find it hard writing about the whole issue of the German collaboration of the Domobranci. When I speak to my Dad I see clearly how he had little choice, and how the Communists were certainly not 100% good, that the world war was a way for the Yugoslav Communists to take control of Yugoslavia, that they were the invaders from within. That they used fear and killings to control and recruit, and massacred around a hundred thousand after they won the war.  However, they also risked their lives fighting the Germans. Yet the Domobranci got their arms from the Italians, then the Germans when the Italians capitulated. Many started off fighting the Germans but then concentrated on fighting the Communists, after the Communists started killing them because they wouldn’t fight as Communists. I can see that Churchill had something to do with this situation as he backed the Communists, not caring who won or lost as long as the side he backed was the side most likely to beat the Germans, leaving the Domobranci little choice about where to get arms. Then Churchill betrayed them after they surrendered, by sending them back to their deaths as part of a land deal. Britain has a lot to answer for, yet many documents Britain has about this time, are still not open to read.


Main photo, left to right, Michael Persin, Matthew Persin, Anna Watkin, Alex Persin, Tina Reid-Peršin, Mariana Vrečar, Maria Persin, Franzi Vrečar, Marko Peršin, Janaya Peršin.